For their next birthday, give tots ages 3+ the gift that keeps on giving: a portable screen device.
For $139.99 bucks, your little prince or princess never has to leave the coziness of their bedroom. Thanks to advances in technology, six-year-olds can completely disengaged from the family. No more noise arguing over Legos, dolls, blocks, crayons or Hot Wheels.
With the Amazon Fire 8” Kids Edition Tablet display—headset and carrying case sold separately—kids can be King and Queen of their own viewing.
I’m serious here. Why risk their well-being exploring the dangerous outdoors? Between crime, global warming, and neighborhood bullies, it’s much better to have the kiddies watching the action from the safety of their bedside.
Forget the CDC reports documenting the link between childhood obesity and inactivity. What do those researchers at the federal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) know about health, anyway? Who are they to claim in a study that 2 million preteens and teens in the U.S. are suffering from a prediabetic condition due to their inactivity and obesity? Enough of the guilt trip already. This is Ammmmerica.
We’re talking about your child’s happiness here. This model includes access to more than 20,000 apps, games, and videos. And, with up to 12 hours of battery life, the kiddos can awaken to the sights and sounds of the tube instead of the voices of their parents—how boring is that? Give ’em Sponge Bob and Sesame Street over Dad and Mom any day.
I say, buy two and save . . . Common sense not included.